Sabres Firefly Superlatives


This is a post I originally posted on my personal blog a few months ago. I thought everyone could use something entertaining that was Sabres related, since there isn’t very much to write about right now. I’m sure you need a palate cleanser after reading my latest blog post. Enjoy one of my rare whimsical Sabres blog posts. So without further ado, I give you my Sabres Firefly Superlatives based on the 2010-2011 roster. I’ll likely update it next season after we see more from the new boys in blue and gold. Enjoy!

I’m going to focus in on the core of the Firefly cast. For those who aren’t familiar with Firefly, I suggest that you become familiar with it. I believe Hulu has all of the episodes up for you to watch. Just check on the order first, because if you watch them in the order FOX aired them you will be lost. Also, this Wikipedia article should do a good job explaining the characters, although you’d be better off just watching it yourself.

The core characters of Firefly are as follows:

-Malcolm “Mal” Reynolds

-Zoe Washburne

-Hoban “Wash”  Washburne

-Jayne Cobb

-Inara Serra

-Kaylee Frye

-Dr. Simon Tam

-River Tam

-Derrial (Sheppard) Book

I hope you find this slightly amusing.

  1. Mal: Thomas Vanek.
    • The obvious leader of the team who always tries to do what is best for the team while struggling with numerous inner demons. A skilled marksmen with his hockey stick.
  2.  Zoe: Jason Pominville
    • A leader in the absence of Vanek. Follows him around like a white fluffy puppy otherwise. Hey wait a minute…
  3. Wash: Ryan Miller
    • He could be listed as Mal, but in all honesty Wash is a better fit. As Ryan goes, so does the team.
  4. Jayne: Patrick Kaleta
    • The “lug nut” of the team. No further explanation needed. I’ll bet you he even named his best hockey stick “Vera.”
  5. Inara: Drew Stafford
    • “Pretty boy,” who makes you wonder about his exploits involving furries. Always along for the ride, but often finds himself caught up in the action.
  6. Kaylee: Nathan Gerbe (via suggestion from @CriminallyVu1ga)
    • The cute and cuddly workhorse who is adored by all. Protected by everyone on the team significantly larger than he is. Kaylee keeps Serenity in the sky, and he often keeps the Sabres in the game.
  7. Simon: Tim Connolly
    • The guy that nobody really likes until he’s needed or does something spectacular. He has the skills, but always seems to end up shooting himself in the foot in the eyes of the fanbase. He’s had enough concussions he could probably treat one as well as any doctor if needed.
  8. River: Tyler Ennis
    • Anything you can do with a puck he can do better. Although not entirely at war with himself, he does have a few demons that need to be exercised.
  9. Sheppard Book: Mike Grier
    • The veteran guy on the team that adds the push in the right direction when he needs to. He can also dish out an unexpected Jayne-esque play when needed. Somewhat of an enigma.

I think that about sums everyone up. As I said I’m open to suggestions and additions if you want. As tough as this was, I might just have to do one with some of the Firefly “villains.” Actually, I just thought of a perfect Firefly analogue to Matt Cooke. Expect that blog in the next few days. It’ll be much more difficult and time consuming.

For no reason at all, here is Mal in a bonnet. I tried editing Vanek into this, but I still haven’t figured out how to do that in Gimp.

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  1. Anchorman, Starring the Sabres « The Ruff Writers - February 23, 2012

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